This plus that equals…. pushing buttons
Here’s the latest instalment in my series of posts all about what makes our lives here at home tick. This week is all about how no one is as good at pushing buttons as L. He has been the cutest kid in the world followed by the absolute worst. I don’t think I have ever felt a rage like it. I reckon it’s pretty much the same for every parent out there.
A request to pick up your toys isn’t done properly unless repeated thirty thousand times right?
Please could you get our clothes ready just whilst I get dressed, it would be really helpful and save me a lot of time. Well that translates to sit down and watch Paw Patrol. Obviously.
Did you have fun at nursery today? Well that can only be answered with complete and absolute silence, you know that sound you want to hear at 5.30am but don’t.
As a general rule he’s a really well behaved kid. So these things probably sound petty. But good grief do they drive me crazy.
Spitting. Well it’s not like he spits at us in a way a grown up does, but he is constantly spraying our faces with very wet raspberries. It doesn’t matter how many times you explain it, ask for it to stop, remove him to a safe distance it does not stop. It’s gross.
Using me as a climbing frame. You would have thought this would be easy behaviour to stop, but it has become his greatest challenge. I am his Everest and he will not be happy until he is stood on top of my head. He is fast though, and sneaky, really sneaky. You think you’re safe then you have a 3 year old perched on top of your shoulder. It hurts and it is relentless.
Of course we get the standard not doing what he’s told, running off, crying and tantrum naughtiness as well.
Cuddles and Kisses
Obviously as a general rule I have no issue with at all. Bring on the cuddles and kisses is my normal rule book. But L has learnt this. He now uses it to his advantage. He is an evil genius.
Mid way through brushing his teeth he’ll run off as he desperately needs to hug whoever isn’t trying to protect him from years of tooth decay.
Bedtime can’t happen until everyone has been hugged and kissed multiple times. Husb can’t go to work without a limpet like child attached to his leg working that guilt trip.
Oh and if he’s being told off, that’s when he turns it on full blast. Big eyes, cute voice, ‘but Mummy I just want a cuddle, I’ll be good forever, I promise’.
He will argue anything. Anything.
We all got loaded into the car the other week to head to the garden centre and soft play. Cue kicking and screaming. He doesn’t want to leave the house. He doesn’t want to go out.
Still crying three villages later. He wants to go home. We are the worst people in the world. I am broken too. Husb is well on the way to being broken. So not wanting to go to soft play anyway we both agree it isn’t worth the hassle.
On telling him we will indeed turn round and go home, he starts crying even more. But he wanted to go to the garden centre. It’s all he has ever wanted to do. Why can’t we go.
Obviously as adults our only reaction is to laugh. Slightly manically. But still we laughed. Then he laughed. Then everything was fine and we had a great day. But did we really have to go through all of that.
This is really killing us at the moment. He’s been dry for quite some time and trust me it was a long slog getting to that stage.
We hadn’t quite mastered staying clean though, but instead of improving that recently got a whole lot worse, meetings at nursery worse.
He is driving us mad because we know he can do it. We also know he is actively choosing not to. It is infuriating. More infuriating is the fact we cannot let him know we are irritated. We must remain calm and collected and he will get it, eventually, at some point, before university lets hope.
So there we have it. My adorable and precious child is also an evil genius and no one can make me angry in quite the way he does and force me to hide it all at the same time. You’ll all be pleased to know I do actually feel better for complaining about it and slightly ridiculous at just how small these things are in comparison to how angry they make me.
Finally, I’m linking up with #TwinklyTuesday, #Blogstravaganza, #StayClassyMama and #fortheloveofBLOG