This plus that equals…. Why I hate forced positivity
Here’s the latest instalment in my series of posts all about what makes our lives here at home tick. This week is a bit of a rant about why I hate forced positivity. You all know I’m a super positive person but I hate it when people try to force me to be positive about something when I just am not.
As you know I’ve had to put a pause on my on my stay at home dream and get a job. I am not feeling great about this because it is not what I want. It is not a great and amazing job. Frankly it is not a positive thing, not for me anyhow. It will pay the bills though and it’s not too many hours, those are quite simply th only positives I can find. So I wish people would stop trying to find all these other ‘positives’ and forcing me to agree.
‘It will be so good for you’
Oh, it will, will it? How’s that then? By crushing my dreams. Taking me away from my son. Wasting my time doing something I don’t love. It’s not a new flipping health food you know.
Yeah it will be fan-f@*cking-tastic.
Let’s just be realistic here and call it what it is, a way to pay the bills. That I suppose is good for me. I shall not be destitute.
‘At least you’ll get adult conversation’
Ummm. I am married you know. My husband is indeed an adult. We do actually talk .
I am not lonely. I quite like my own company and/or chatting about tractors with my son. As a general rule I’m not a big fan of other people, so when I want to see people I like to choose who I see. You know what if I ever feel in need of a bit of adult conversation during the day I have several friends I can call or meet up with. People I have actually chosen to have in my life for their awesomness.
‘It doesn’t have to be forever’
No it doesn’t. I do know this and strangely enough I’ll be trying my damn hardest to make sure this is the case.
But what if it is forever?
At this precise moment in time it feels like the biggest thing in the world to me and it does feel like the start of a slippery slope to forever. I took up my last job as a temporary 6 month contract until I found myself a real job it took me ten years to find myself a real job and leave and that’s just gone tits up. So excuse me if I can’t see through to the other side just yet.
‘It’s not many hours a week’
Again this is true. But it’s more hours out of the house than I was spending.
I’m on a flexible type of contract where you are expected to work as many hours as needed, which is already over and above the actual contracted amount.
I can barely fit everything in as it is. How the f@*ck do I stand in the slightest chance of doing it now.
‘You should try to be a bit more positive about it’
Actually I am being positive about it. I’m positive this isn’t what I want. So instead of upsetting myself by talking about it I’m just getting on with the hand I have been dealt.
If you want me to be more positive, stop talking to me about it. I don’t want to. My way of being positive about this change is to accept it, not moan about it and not talk about it.
I’ll be positive about something else but if you keep on forcing me to be positive about this I’ll either cry or say something I regret to you.
So just back off.
I guess overall my point is, even the most positive of people can’t be positive all the time. When other people try and force you to feel something you don’t it has quite the opposite effect. So if someone tells you they aren’t feeling good about a situation, and they don’t want to talk about. Don’t try to find a million reasons they should be happy it, just respect that they aren’t and don’t talk about it.
Finally, I’m linking up with #TheBabyFormula, #TwinklyTuesday and #fortheloveofBLOG