This plus that equals…. My New Happy
Here’s the latest instalment in my series of posts all about what makes our lives here at home tick. This week is all about how things have changed for me recently and what my new happy looks like.
New friends and old
I have made a real effort to be social and push myself out of my comfort zone and it has paid off so much. To the extent where it’s not even a push anymore, turns out I’m right in the middle of a new comfort zone.
I’m spending time with old friends and finding the time to see them more. I’m making time to spend with my new friends and having so much fun. It would appear I’m a bit of a social butterfly, which is a bit of a shock to me.
This new me, where I have friends over for coffee in the morning and see people for lunch and even arrange the odd evening out, this is a very happy me.
Whilst I still pretty much hate it that L goes to school and I miss him so much, I do love the new routine that it has bought.
It is busy and hectic but incredibly well structured and has left me feeling in control and less like I’m constantly chasing my tail.
I have work days, when it’s up, breakfast washing, school run, clean something, work, school run, homework, tea and bed. No time for stopping, no time for mucking about, I just have to knuckle down and get on with things and that is actually brilliant. I am the queen of prevarication, so to have the option removed from me is wonderful.
Then there are the non work days and those are even more wonderful as they open up so much time for me and I really needed that, just time for me.
Taking time to be me
In some ways I have actually become a bit selfish. I am concentrating on me, my life, my problems.
On the days I get to myself I am not running round doing favours for other people, sure I will if I have time, but I am first and foremost ensuring that I spend that time on me.
A walk, a haircut, blogging. Making a delicious salad for lunch. Seeing friends or even, shocker, just watching TV.
If I want to go somewhere or do something I am making sure it happens and not allowing my things to get pushed to the bottom of the pile, I’ve spent years being last and I won’t do it anymore. I am for once, taking time to be me and it is lovely.
Health and diet
I have been following Weight Watchers since around June time and have lost 3 stone. I am still allowing myself the odd treat and making sure that I eat things I enjoy. Which is somewhere I had been going wrong.
I’m the only vegetarian in the house and I had been neglecting myself. I love salads, soups, vegetables. But hadn’t been having many because my husband does not like them. But now I’ve decided if I’m going to look after myself right, then I should have the food I love, especially as I actually love healthy food.
I have also been trying to exercise more when I can. The new routine nd the school run have helped with that, but on top of that I have taken to just going out for a walk in the evening. After I’ve got L in bed, on the nights when my husband is home, I go and walk.
New and improved boundaries
I always struggle with saying no. Feeling like I can’t upset or disappoint people. That often leaves me in situations I really do not want to be in. Situations that from the second I say yes to them leave me filled with worry and anxiety.
Well now I’m getting a lot better with those boundaries and saying no.
An event that is going to cost me too much and leave me anxious is met with a ‘sorry I can’t make it’. Non essential get togethers which I know will rock my self esteem too violently are declined and the essential ones are attended with me keeping myself at arms length from harm.
There are some people in my life, that try as might, are not going to change and are not good for me, so limiting my contact with them is making me happier and stronger.
Finally, I’m linking up with #TwinklyTuesday, #Blogstravaganza and #StayClassyMama