This Plus That Equals...

This Plus That Equals…. Help, Real Help

This plus that equals…. help, real help

Here’s the latest instalment in my series of posts all about what makes our lives here at home tick. This week is all about help, getting help, accepting help, just actual real help.

Yeah, he’ll need washing

Don’t ask stupid questions, in fact, sometimes don’t ask at all

Is the bin full? Is it starting to overflow? Are you standing right next to it?

If the answer to any one of those questions is yes, then just go ahead and empty it.

If the answer to all three is yes, don’t ask your wife who is busy cleaning the kitchen if you should empty them. By any chance if you do ask, which is foolish, then don’t get cross when you get a rather snippy response.

This theory can be applied to many a simple task, not just bins. If it obviously needs doing. Just do it. Full bins, laundry, dishwasher, dusting, empty gin glass…….



Don’t do half a job, it’s infuriating

If you’ve settled upon a way to help out, dear god please see it through to completion.

Saying you’ve cleaned the bathroom when you haven’t touched the toilet, is not in fact cleaning the bathroom.

Being able to use both the washing machine and the tumble dryer may seem like an achievement but if nothing has been put away and you’ve just left bags of clean laundry to be folded you will get the cold shoulder for a few hours.

Putting out the wheelie bin before the household bins have been emptied is just plain foolish.

Just pick one task and finish it. All of it.

Saving Time
Offer with a smile

When offering help, try to seem like you mean it

Offering to take the child to nursery when you are already halfway out the house and complaining about being late isn’t really the offer of help you may think it is.

Whilst in your own head it may be a genuine offer that you truly mean and you don’t actually mind hanging around another 20 minutes to get the kid dressed and for nursery to be open, it doesn’t appear that way to the person you are offering help to.

The person you are offering to help hears the words but can only see the keys in hand, obvious stress and the many ways in which that ‘favour’ would be putting you out. So will decline. They will also be bitter about declining, so just think about what your offer actually looks like.

Accept the help

If offered help, and you need it, just accept it, honestly

If you’ve been up half the night because you’re ill and someone offers to help you out. Whether you believe they mean it or not. Even if you feel you are being an inconvenience. For crying out loud just say yes. Accept all the help and take the time to get better.

If you keep on refusing help people will start to think you don’t need it and that you are fine. Even if in reality it’s all a front and you are barely keeping your head above water.

If you are lucky enough to be offered help, actual real help that would indeed be useful, then stop worrying about how it will affect those offering it and just say yes!

Make the most of your team and ask for help if you need it

Ask for help when you need it, whenever and however that may be

You may think it’s really obvious that something needs doing. Or that you need some support. To you (and a good 50% of the population) it is really obvious, but to someone else it most likely isn’t.

Most people aren’t horrible people and won’t ignore something that needs doing, or someone who needs help knowingly. At least that’s what I hope. So chances are if something isn’t happening how you want, it’s because they don’t know.

Life gets way easier when you just ask for what you need. If you still don’t get it, at least you know where you stand.

Trust me, I know it’s hard to ask for help and sometimes it feels like banging your head against a brick wall. I really struggle with this.  But if you don’t ask it just won’t happen, or you’ll burn out in the process of doing it all.

Finally, I’m linking up with #TwinklyTuesday, #Blogstravaganza, #StayClassyMama and #fortheloveofBLOG



Confessions of a New Mummy

Bringing up Georgia

2 thoughts on “This Plus That Equals…. Help, Real Help”

  1. Sorry but I had to have a good chuckle. We don’t rely on a cleaning service so basically house cleaning is our responsibility. We now have roped the girls in and given them their chores. So everybody is doing their bit around which makes it easier. On the other hand doing half jobs always creeps in and moaning to do it. But I always double check and they need to do it over and with regards to the moaning – I just pretend to be deaf.#TwinklyTuesday
    Noleen Miller recently posted…Oh shucks, have we transformed into squirrels?My Profile

    1. A cleaning service would be lovely, that’s the dream!! Maybe then I wouldn’t get so annoyed at my husband ignoring the mountain of rubbish surrounding kitchen bin!!

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